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A Warm Welcome Back... for Jalb_k

The Liberty floated calmly and quietly through space. A single twinkle of light broke the serene calm. An A-wing exited hyperspace and headed toward the Calamari Cruiser.

"This is Liberty Flight Control Officer to Rogue One. Please respond," Silk said.

"This is Rogue One. Requesting permission to land in docking bay."

"Permission granted. Follow the landing lights as normal, and Jalb. Welcome home."

Jalb smiled and replied, "Thanks Silk. It's good to be back."

Jalb walked down the corridor to his quarters. He thought, "Boy it's nice to be back."

He keyed the door and hit the light switch. Nothing. "Sithspawn!" Jalb groped around until he found his lamp. Again nothing. "Arrggghhh, I leave for a few months and nothing works when I come back." After a few minutes, Jalb found his flashlight, and proceeded to get ready for bed.

Jalb climbed into bed. "I missed being here," he smiled. Jalb felt a slight twinge on his back. He rubbed his body on his bed to calm the itch. That didn't seem to help. So he turned over on his stomach and reached back to scratch it. He then felt his chest and stomach starting to itch too. "Oh no!" he moaned. Jalb got out of bed and reached for his flashlight, itching all the way. He shone the light on the bed. "Itching powder! I'm going to get someone for this." His eyes landed on something partially covered by his pillow. It was a note, and it had two words on it. "Got ya!"

After several hours of itching and scratching, Jalb finally got to sleep. In the morning he headed for the lounge. Jalb took a look around. He had made a mental list of the usual culprits. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Hellcat, Condor, and Syntax at a table together. They were all talking softly and smirking at him. "I think I know who did it," he thought.

With that thought, he headed for the bar and sat down. Motioning to Mixer, he ordered his favorite drink a Sundowner and sat there thinking about what he was going to do about last night. "If it is those three, how can I get them? I think I'll keep my options open and not act until I'm sure who it was."


The next day

Vidster stepped off the shuttle, into the hangar bay of the Liberty. He was tired, because an annoying person happened to sit next to him and talked to him the whole flight back. His leave refreshed him a lot, but he still needed to catch some sleep. He headed straight for his quarters. Many of the Liberty's personnel greeted him as he passed, but he said nothing. He got to his door and let out a sigh of relief. "Boy, I need some sleep, and this is going to be the place," Vidster thought. He opened his door. To his dismay, a figure was standing on the other side. It had big ears, and a long snout.

"Oh no," Vidster groaned. He recognized the figure immediately. The Gungan spoke. "Mesa welcomes yousa to desa Gungan Ho' Down. Pleasa, staysa while and dance."

"God, make it disappear," Vidster groaned. The Gungan started to dance. "Please God. I won't do anything to harm anybody if you make it stop." Vidster walked in and closed his door, and the figure disappeared.

"Thank you," he said, relieved. He headed for his dresser to unpack his luggage. He was horrified when he opened a drawer. It was filled mini-Jar-Jar dolls. He closed it immediately. He decided to fix that problem later. He opened his underwear drawer. His regular Rogue Squadron Underwear was all gone! Instead, there were Jar-Jar undies! "NOOOOOOOO!!!!!" Vidster screamed. He slammed that drawer shut. "I think I will just get some sleep, and deal with the person who did this later."

Then he saw his bed, Vidster got even angrier. His Rogue Squadron Pillow, custom made with "Rogue 2" was upside-down. Also, there was a big lump in his bed. He walked over. There were two pictures on his pillow. One showed an X-wing, with it's exterior painted with Gungans. The second picture showed the interior of an X-wing cockpit, and it too had Gungans inside of it, and to top it all off a life-size Jar-Jar doll was sitting in the pilot's seat. "Someone is gonna die if that is my X-wing!" Vidster yelled. He turned over his pillow to see his familiar Rogue Squadron pillow, except it had Jar-Jar's ugly face printed on it. "Someone is definitely gonna die for this," Vidster growled.

He turned his attention to his bed sheets. They were also upside down as well, and Vidster was curious to see what was making the bulge under the cover. He tore the cover off the bed, only to see a big pile of mini-Jar-Jar dolls! And his normal cover had been transformed to a picture of Jar-Jar! "WHO DID THIS? I'M GONNA KILL YOU!" He yelled, with the rage swelling inside of him.

After this he finished his cursing and yelling, Vidster heard a muffled laugh and then some clanking outside his door. He broke for the door instantly, and skidded to a halt outside his door. Vidster saw someone in a metal suit clanking down the hall. Vidster, fueled by anger, headed off in a dead run. When he was about ten feet away, he jumped and tackled the person. The two ended up in a pile at the end of the hall.

Vidster turned the mysterious person over. "Whoever you are, you are so dead," Vidster yelled. After he got them turned over, he saw whom it was. It was Bulldog, and he was laughing uncontrollably. Vidster grinned, "Just wait until you see what I have planned for you."

Bulldog stopped laughing after he saw the extremely evil smile on Vidster's face. "Oh no," he moaned.


About twenty-four hours later

Darklighter whistled as he walked down a hall of the Liberty on his way to the Lounge. As he continued, Animal, Buccaneer CO, joined him. Darklighter saluted him and then the two started conversing.

"Animal have you seen Bulldog around lately? I'm a little concerned because it's not like him to disappear this long," Darklighter questioned.

"Well, I can't say that I have. Hey, I noticed something on my last perimeter defense sweep that I'm sure the Liberty hasn't had before. The Liberty was towing something. It looked to me like an oversized space suit, but when I asked the comm officer he said it was the new experimental towed sensor package," Animal replied.

"Really? When was this?" Darklighter asked.

"Oh about an hour ago, but the comm officer he said it was out being towed yesterday," Animal said. The two continued talking and had just about reached the Lounge. "Hey did you hear what happened to Jalb and Vids?" Animal asked.

Darklighter chuckled, "I did hear about Jalb, but not Vids. What happened to him?"

Animal told Darklighter all about what happened to Vidster. Both of them laughed the whole time.

"So, did Vidster tell who did it during the Command Staff meeting?" Darklighter asked.

"No, but he said he'd taken..." Animal and Darklighter stopped walking. They looked at each other. "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"

"I think so. That is a suit, and Bulldog's in it."

The two pilots turned and started running for the hangar.


Earlier that day

In the past on board the Liberty, Hellcat had had his run-ins with the Ewok Security Force, and this time he wanted some revenge for good. On his way to the location that they had hung him upside down, he happened to pass by Gemini. "Gemini," Hellcat said with a nod of his head. Although Gemini never passed Hellcat much through the corridors he knew enough that with the look Hellcat had on his face he was going to be up to no good, and soon. So giving a slight nod of his head he turned the corner and waited for Hellcat to go down a ways before following him.

About 5 minutes later, Hellcat came to a location that he had noted as being the place he was hung upside down. So opening his case, he took out various tools and started to assemble something. In the meantime, Gemini caught up and was hiding himself from Hellcat while noticing all that was going on.

Finally recognizing the instrument Hellcat was making, Gemini decided to make his move. "You're not doing something that I wouldn't be doing are you Hellcat?"

The immediate break in silence startled Hellcat enough to make him drop his tools as he looked up at the security officer. "Uhh no, just I'm working on a project."

"Is that so? Must be some project considering you're making a pretty high tech booby trap, huh?"

Knowing he had been caught, Hellcat sighed heavily; he knew he would get reported, but little did Gemini know that Hellcat had pre-planned his being caught.

Taking advantage of the distance between Gemini and himself, Hellcat turned on the ball of his right foot and took off in a mad dash for the nearest lift. Gemini immediately took off after the Rogue pilot while signaling for his special unit of Ewok officers.

When Hellcat had almost reached the lift to take him back up to the hangar level, he saw an Ewok swoop down from above to try and nail him in the face, but Hellcat quickly ducked to avoid the kick. When he entered the lift, he punched in the deck that the hangar was located on, as well as taking some time to catch his breath again. When the lift came to a stop, the pilot started casually walking down the corridor so as to not attract too much attention, but the sight of Gemini and his furball friends caused him to get back on the move.

Rounding a corner, he saw Stryker and Vidster walking down the corridor, and took the time to salute while in mid-stride. "Sirs!" Both the CO and XO looked at each other wondering what had just happened, until Gemini made his way between them.

Chuckling under his breath, Stryker made another small note on his datapad, "Assign Hellcat to tug duty, for the fourth time this month. Ahh to be young and full of all that desire to pilot tugs when you get in trouble."

"You'd think he's starting to enjoy the cramped up space of the tug, Vince," Vidster smiled as he turned with Stryker to continue back down the corridor.

"Maybe so, but would he enjoy it so much if we gave him some company?" At once both the men thought up one name at the same time, "Condor!"

"Yes, both of them have an ego about the size of a rancor," Stryker said while making the notice on the pad.

Meanwhile, Hellcat was still running hotfooted to the hangar and was now using as much energy as he could to pull away from the pack behind him. Though it took some time, he was finally able to pull away some to initiate his plan. Signaling Buzz on his wrist pad he told the droid to make sure preparations were complete and to start the plan in 10 seconds. 10 seconds later Hellcat came busting into the hangar bay and immediately hid behind a stack of crates next to the wall.

At the same time, Buzz came down the ramp of the shuttle with his dome head turned up into the shuttle compartment chirping rather lude comments... almost as if he was talking to Hellcat.

Right at that moment, Gemini and his team came into the hangar and saw Buzz coming down the ramp, and only figured one thing. The pilot was hiding inside. Silently walking over to the craft, he started pointing fingers for the Ewoks to take position, and when he finally reached the bottom of the shuttle ramp he spoke up into it. "Hellcat, I thought I made it clear that these pranks were going to be put to cease and not only did you try to put up a device to pull a prank. You tried to do it to the Ewok Security Force. Anything that you'd like to say right now?"

Praying that Buzz installed the radio device right, Hellcat spoke into his comm pad, "Sure! Would it be all right if you and your friends down there brought me an order of beef soup with a glass of water? I'm kinda hungry and thirsty after all that running. You did pretty good Gem."

Sure enough, Hellcat's voice seemed to be coming out of the shuttle's bay, even though he was behind a stack of crates. And just as he thought, Gemini took what he said bitterly, "I'll give you 5 seconds to come down that ramp, pilot or else."

"Or else...I can go without being wrote up on report?"

Annoyed by this time, Gemini used hand gestures to move his Ewok buddies in, and they did.

Gemini was the last one to run up the ramp and didn't notice the fact that one of the Ewoks was already on his way back down until it was too late.

"Now Buzz!" Hellcat shouted, and the droid sent a signal to the autopilot on board the shuttle to start take off procedures. During the trip that Hellcat took to get up to the hangar, Buzz had programmed an irreversible autopilot program that would take the shuttle to the nearest planet's orbit, where it would then overload the hyperdrive circuitry causing a malfunction that could only be repaired on board the Liberty. To add to that program, the R2 unit also programmed a voice program that would ask for clearance to take off, and that it did. Hellcat smiled as he saw the shuttle exit the hangar and off into space.

"Well that takes care of that, Ewoks and all," Hellcat got up brushing his knees and whistling as the loud speaker came on.

"Hellcat and Condor, please report to Colonel Rambo's office at once."

Dropping his head down, Hellcat knew what this was going to be about, but it wasn't the fact that he was going to get tug duty that he dropped his head; it was the fact that he'll probably get paired up with Condor.


Gemini and the Ewok Security Force sat in the shuttle as it took off through space, at first a little upset. However, they quickly got over it as they realized that they had not been acting like themselves, as only amateurs would charge straight into a prepped shuttle sitting in the middle of a hangar with no proof that anyone was on it. Although Gemini personally held little value in the Force, the Ewoks were quick to explain that the only reason they could have made such a rookie mistake was if the Force had modified their thinking to get them on the shuttle for some reason. Therefore, there must be some good to come of the situation.

Thinking for a few seconds, it suddenly hit Gemini. When he had crossed paths with Hellcat, he had been on his way back to his office to complete a large mound of paperwork. Now that he had a little impromptu vacation, no one could possibly expect him to complete it, now. He let the Ewoks in on this, and a big cheer went through the craft.

Examining the craft in a cheery state of mind, Gemini realized that Hellcat had forgotten to disable the communications array. Thinking about this, Gemini suddenly realized that Hellcat had forgotten one very important fact about the Ewoks on the Liberty. They were rich (NB: In case you do not remember, Paladin made a post awhile ago about how the Ewok's luck and sound investment strategy made them incredibly rich). Their money had grown so much that they had decided on purchasing their own ship, so that they could dispatch Ewok crews across the galaxy to attack Gungans and any other species that tried to corner the market on adorable, sci-fi kiddy toys, and also so they had a place to hang out during their shore leave.

They purchased themselves a top of the line Star Destroyer, redesigned the interior into a grand pleasure ship, better than anything even the Mon Calamari had come up with. They christened her the ESD Starcruiser, and the ship was currently following the Liberty around.

With a few quick taps on the comm equipment, Gemini had the Ewok captain of the ship on screen, and he was assured that the Starcruiser would pick them up within a half an hour. Gemini relayed this even better news to the Ewoks in the shuttle, and the small craft erupted into a party. The Ewoks all pulled various delicious alcoholic beverages out of the patches where they kept them hidden just in case of the spontaneous parties that Ewoks have been known to throw.

As Gemini leaned back and sipped his drink, awaiting the arrival of the Starcruiser, another idea hit him. Heading back to the communications console, he interfaced with the Liberty security controls and got into the communication systems for the maintenance tugs. Hellcat was likely to get tug duty for his pranks, and Gemini would make certain that he would remember this time on the tug. He quickly and adroitly programmed the tug communications equipment to continuously play Ewok songs at a high volume. Gemini laughed to himself as he buried the commands deep in the system, so that only his super, duper top-secret security password could undo it. He then also turned on the same music for Hellcat's quarters using the ships internal communications system. When he got back from his nice little vacation on the Starcruiser, he might think about turning the music off.


"Move over I'm flying," Hellcat pushed Condor away from the stick as he positioned himself in the seat.

A bit annoyed, Condor fired back, "I don't think so Kitty. Your flying can nearly get anyone killed!"

"That's because no one can handle the moves I've got!" Hellcat said as he punched in the launch sequence into the tug's engines.

"Yeah sure HC, not only do you not have moves, but you also don't have the brains to avoid being caught. Which reminds me, just why am I doing tug duty with you?!"

"I was wondering that myself, I guess the boss got tired of seeing you do nothing other than hit on girls in the Lounge. All I know is that you are NOT taking the controls, I've flown her more times than you so I get seniority over it," Hellcat said sticking his nose in the air as if he just beat Condor.

As the tug exited the hangar, Condor punched a few keys on the console to bring up mission duties the two pilots would be doing in the tug. "Hey hey hey! First assignment is to dock with the Freighter Mas, fix their hyperdrive, and move onto our next assignment, but look what's on board the boat," Condor pointed at the screen while turning his head with a smile fixed on his face.

Taking one glance at it, Hellcat noticed it was being used as casino vessel, and where there was a casino there was bound to be, "WOMEN!" Both pilots shouted out with enthusiasm in their voices. Before Hellcat could push the throttle full forward, Condor had already taken the liberty to do so for him, so the tug made its way to repair the freighter.

However, a message came over the comm from Colonel Rambo, "Guys, you will refrain from docking with the freighter, we've already got a ship heading out there to do the duty." The message ended with a slight chuckle. Hearing Stryker laugh at the end of message only meant that he had overheard the conversation going on in the cabin of the tug.

"Great job Condor, you could have made sure the communications system was not keyed on during our conversation!"

"Hey don't even go there, Kitty, you're the one sitting by the comm system, duh."

Hellcat frowned knowing that Condor was right. "Well whatever, what's the next assignment." Just then the onboard speaker system came to life, blaring out loud music that neither of the pilots could recognize just yet. Trying to key in numerous commands, Hellcat tried to shut the speaker system down but to no avail. The music being played was of Ewok origin and the Rogue pilot could only think of one person that would do such a devilish act, Gemini.

By now, Hellcat was wondering how much worse his day could get, first being assigned to tug duty with Condor, now this? What next? The comm chirped again. This time it was not Stryker.

"Hellcat is that you?" Darklighter called over the comm.

"Yes, it is, and Condor is with me, and to top it all off, we have Ewok music blaring over the comm system," Hellcat said with chagrin.

"Well I need you to add something to your list of assignments. You see that thing the Liberty is towing? Animal and I think that's Bulldog in a suit. Could you drop by and find out and if it is, bring him in," Darklighter asked.

"You're kidding right?" Hellcat answered back.

"I'm afraid not. You hear what happened to Vidster. Well, I think Bulldog did it, and you know Vids would be that mean and do that to him," Darklighter said.

"Darklighter is right. Vids would do that," Condor replied.

Hellcat then called back, "If Vids did it, I'm not sure I want to go get him. How long has that been out there?"

"A day, Hellcat. I'll take care of Vidster," Animal said.

"Ok," the tug pilot said, "Since it's your head on the line."

An hour passed, the two pilots finally managed to finish their duties, even with the loud music playing. They also made it back to the Liberty in one piece. They also brought Bulldog in from behind the Liberty. Bulldog said that he would make it up to them later. When they got out of the tug, Condor pushed Hellcat aside and walked off to his quarters. Hellcat knew why his friend pushed him aside and could only agree that he would have done the same thing. However, he was glad to be back on board where there was, finally, no Ewok music playing. So he decided to take a break from everything and get some rest before having flight duty tomorrow at 0600.

On his way to his quarters, Hellcat passed by Vidster, and noticed the XO trying to withhold the laugh he so much wanted to let out. Annoyed, Hellcat, continued to look in front of him so as to try and act like he didn't notice Vids, but the sudden outburst of laughter as Vids walked by him made him notice all to clearly now. Sighing heavily he was thankful to have finally made it to his quarters, but something was different. From the outside he heard more Ewok music playing and could only pray that it wasn't coming from inside his very own quarters. Punching in a series of buttons, the door opened, and HC was nearly thrown to the ground by the sudden loudness of the music.

Having about enough of it, Hellcat marched down to the quartermaster's office, told the QM to give him his gun so he could check something out. Thinking that was what the pilot was really going to do, the QM handed the Rogue pilot his rifle cautiously. Taking the gun, Hellcat proceeded to do an inspection of his weapon until he caught the QM off guard and quickly ran back to his quarters. Raising the muzzle of the rifle to the position where the loud speaker would be, he pulled the trigger. Claxons blared throughout the ship, but he didn't care...he was just happy that the music had stopped. The only consequence to this action was that he would once again be out in tug duty.


Bulldog walked into his quarters. He stretched. "Man, I finally got rescued from being towed by the Liberty. A hot shower is going to feel so good." Bulldog proceeded to get ready for his hot shower. He entered the 'fresher, and stepped into the tub. He reach down and turned on the water. FOOOOSH!!! To Bulldog's utter amazement not water but shaving cream came out of the shower head covering him in a layer of white foam. "AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!"

Bulldog yelled, "Someone's going to get it!"

After hearing Bulldog's scream, a mysterious figure chuckled and stole off to another part of the ship.


Later that evening

Alli slowly walked down the corridor to her quarters. She had just finished a supply run and in about ten minutes was going to have dinner with Krayt. Alli keyed the door. As soon as she walked in the door, a she got drenched by a bucket of water. Even before she could get over her surprise, a bag of flour emptied on her head and made her completing white.

Meanwhile, Pika was just walking out of the kitchen area. When it saw Alli covered in flour, Pika got scared. "Pika-chuuu!!!" And with that Pika zapped Alli with a big electrical charge.

"Ouch!!!!! Pika, it's me! Why'd you let someone in here and do this?" Alli then saw her answer. Pika had bits of jelly and Jell-O all over him. "Sithspit, someone is going to pay dearly for this." Then there was a knock on the door.

Krayt walked into Alli's quarters. "What happened?" he asked.

"Duh. Someone pulled a prank on me and Pika," Alli remarked. As if to answer the unasked question, they heard evil laughter coming from the corridor.

Krayt bolted for the door. He looked down the hall, and saw a figure slip around the corner. Krayt ran for the corner. He turned and started down the next corridor. Krayt slipped and slid most of the way down the hall. "What in the world is the floor covered with? It seems like some kind of oil." As Krayt tried to get up, an arm came swinging around the corner holding a bag. Krayt brought his arms up to deflect the bag but it didn't hit him. It only opened and flour flew everywhere covering him and the hall.

Laughter came echoing from the next corridor, as Krayt slipped and fell trying to get up on the oil soaked floor.


Syntax stepped from his quarters, and glanced down the hall, to see Krayt get doused in flour. Syntax noted the mysterious person who started running down the hall, and zoomed in his telescopic photoreceptors, trying to get a better look at the prankster. However, the prankster rounded a corner, and Syntax was unable to get a positive ID. Syntax ducked back into his quarters, and popped open his closet. Syntax reached down into the bottom of the closet, and pulled out two large cans of Silly String, one red and one blue. He popped open two hidden panels on the sides of his thighs, and ejected the 4" vibroblades in each (think the gun holsters that Robocop had), then twirled the two cans of Silly String, and locked them into the compartments on his legs. The compartments closed, and Syntax stepped back out into the hall. "Let's get to work," he spoke to himself, and engaged his thermal imager, which would allow him to see residual body heat. Therefore he would be able to track this prankster wherever he ran.

Syntax jogged down the first corridor, giving Krayt a crisp salute, who managed to return one, despite his predicament, and then jogged down the next hall. He checked his imager and rounded a corner. Syntax, then heard a chirp. He spun to his left, just as an automated paintball turret let loose on his position. Syntax rolled back a few feet, the rounds tracking where he had just been, before he heard another chirp. Pulling off a quick 180-degree turn, Syntax spun around...to find himself staring down the barrel of another turret.

Syntax started walking back to his quarters, a large pink paintball spot right between his photoreceptors and decided to rethink his plan...


Krayt saluted Syntax as he went by, and then Krayt slipped again. Finally he was able to get up, and he headed in the direction that he had see the prankster. He got around the corner, and cleaned his shoes off. Then, he started running to follow Syntax. Krayt reached a 'T' intersection, and saw Syntax round one of the corners. Krayt headed off at top speed to catch up. He wanted to get this prankster.

Syntax was slowly backing away from the turrets. Then, all of the sudden, WHAAAMMM!!!! Krayt came around the corner and ran into Syntax making both of them sprawl all over the floor. The turrets pelted them with numerous paintballs. Finally the turrets ran out of ammo, and Syntax and Krayt dismantled them in a very violent manner.


The next day...

It was about 0800 hours. Hellcat was in a daze as he headed for the flight deck. He was grumbling to himself about the stupid tug duty with Condor. "I can't wait until someone finds out who this prank puller is and when someone does, just wait see what he gets," Hellcat grinned.

As Hellcat entered the flight deck, he saw Condor over by their tug. "Hurry up Hellcat, you're going to make us both late. Besides I didn't do anything. Why am I here?" Condor teased.

"Oh cool it, Condor. Gemini put that crappy Ewok music in my quarters too. So, I got my rifle and killed the loudspeaker," Hellcat shot back.

"So, that's what those alarms were," Condor laughed.

They got the hatch for the tug open. "I hope we don't have too many more of these flights," Condor said.

"I totally agree," Hellcat stated. After he said that, Hellcat plopped down in his seat. Splat!!! A pie came and smacked him square in the face. Condor burst out laughing. While he was laughing, he too sat down, and surprise! He found himself also covered in a pie. This time it was Hellcat's turn to laugh. After the laughing and cleaning up was complete, the tug lifted off.

"Since we're out here and have nothing to do. Let's dream up a good prank for our new prankster," Hellcat suggested. "Sounds like a plan," Condor remarked.


Rancor walked into the lounge. He looked around for the rest of Buccaneer Squadron. He spotted them in the corner and headed over to the table.

"You're late Rancor," Animal said.

"Sorry sir," Rancor replied.

"Now that we are all here let's get down to business.

Just then a young ensign, carrying a pizza size box, walked up to the group. "Excuse me sirs, I was told to bring this to you," he said.

"What is it?" Animal asked.

"I don't know sir, but I believe it is a pizza," he replied and then walked off.

"Well if someone wants to provide us pizza, alright!" Prowler exclaimed.

Guardian opened the box. The box erupted with shaving cream and confetti. Animal, Paladin, Prowler, Rancor, and Guardian looked at each other. They were all covered in shaving cream and confetti. Calmly Animal said, "New order of business, find that ensign and figure out who this prankster is."


Hellcat and Condor were still hunching over the terminals in the tug, but not to fly it. "Hurry up already will you, Hellcat," Condor complained.

"Hey this isn't easy trying to see whose id was used to open the tug's hatch," Hellcat retorted.

"I thought you were a computer whiz," Condor snipped.

"There I got it, and the prankster is....what?!?" Hellcat seemed puzzled.

"Who is it?" Condor asked.

"It says it's Darklighter. That little sneak... I would have never thought it was him," Hellcat said.


Prowler finally managed to track down the ensign. "Hey you," Prowler said.

"Sir?" he replied.

"Who told you to give that to us?" Prowler questioned.

"I don't know his name, but he had blond hair, blue eyes, and was wearing a Rogue Squadron patch," he said.

"Thanks ensign. Animal," Prowler called into his comlink, "It's a blond haired, blue eyed pilot in Rogue."

"Hmmm, if you rule out Vids that leaves Mighty and Darklighter," Animal replied. Then both Animal and Prowler heard a chirp signaling a third person had joined them on the line.

"You guys want some interesting info?" Hellcat said.

"Like what?" the two Buccaneer pilots asked.

"Like who the prankster is." Hellcat answered. Both Buccs answered to the affirmative. "It's Darklighter. Condor and I are working now something. Interested?" Hellcat grinned....



Mighty was walking through the halls. He was whistling, happy as usual. He rounded a corner, and he almost ran into the most beautiful nurse he had ever seen. She was a human, 5' 8'', blond hair and blue eyes. Mighty found himself staring. She spoke. "Ooohhh, easy big boy. What is your name? Mine is Katherine."

Mighty replied, "M-M-my n-name is M-mighty. I am a R-r-r-rogue." He managed to pull that much off, before he completely froze.

"Well, we might have to check out your speech problem, won't we, Mighty? Why don't you take me to your quarters?" Kat said.

"S-s-s-s-sure, this way." Mighty started to lead the way. He looked back, and the nurse was following him. He was so distracted by the fact that he was going to score, that he didn't notice the astromech that followed him into his room.

The nurse looked around a bit, and then spoke. "Ok. Let me see that mouth."

Mighty opened his mouth, and thought she was trying to hug him. He tried to hug back, closing his eyes to meet her lips. He felt nothing. He saw the nurse, and her arms were around him, yet he felt nothing. He was too busy trying to figure out what happened when the astromech bolted out of his room, and the nurse disappeared. "Sithspawn! Someone set me up!" he shouted.

Around the corner, Bulldog chuckled to himself. "One suspect down," he said, "Now for the other suspect to pay for that shower prank."

Hellcat had just gotten back from his tug duty. It was long, especially long because he was stuck with Condor, again, and they had stay to figure out who the prankster was. All he needed was a hot shower and a hot meal. He reached his quarters, opened the door, and found a nice, hot meal sitting on his bunk. There was a note next to it. It read: "Hey buddy. I made this for you because I know how annoying that Ewok music was and being stuck with Condor two times during tug duty can be [:)], so I cooked you this nice and hot meal. First off, I got the meat from a contact I had on Calamari. It is some kind of fish or something. Anyway, I prepared it with everything in the recipe, so I hope you enjoy. Your Bud, Bulldog."

"Alright! A free, hot meal! Thanks buddy." He took one bite, started chewing, and started hating Bulldog instantly. The first sensation was heat. The second however was sour and spicy put together. He ran to the 'fresher, and saw a cup that was placed there. There was another note by it. It read: "Hey buddy, if you find this, then you know I feel bad about the fish that I stuffed with Haban'ero peppers. I made a mixture of milks and stomach medicines that should help you out. Sorry, Bulldog." Hellcat immediately looked at the mixture. It wasn't much to look at, and he didn't trust Bulldog at the moment. Hellcat decided to start gulping down water, instead. It wasn't helping, and the heat was getting worse. He was desperate. So, Hellcat tried the drink. It actually worked. The pain and taste went away.

Hellcat started to walk out of the 'fresher, then his stomach started to growl, and he had the sudden urge to go back into the 'fresher. His insides turned again, and he knew that he had to go. He dropped his pants in an instant, and ran into the stall. He sat down... Another note, sitting in plain sight on the stall door read: "Well, I told you it was a mixture of milks and medicines. In this case, I used Milk of Magnesia, which is both a milk and a medicine. Bulldog, Corsair Six."

"YOU are so dead Bulldog!" HC yelled, and then felt another wave coming on. Bulldog walked into the bathroom. He filled a cup with water, and held it over the stall door. "Well, you have to catch me first, bud" Bulldog said, as he dumped the water and ran. The water missed Hellcat, and he had finished his business. He laughed at the ineffectiveness of Bulldog's delaying action. Then he saw the soaked hunk of toilet paper sitting in the only stall of this bathroom.


Mighty left his quarters for he was scheduled on maintenance duty. Mighty wondered who had a sick enough sense of humor to pull something like that. Mighty thought, "Who would be demented enough to have a droid break into my quarters and project a hologram out into the hall and lead it to here?" Mighty arrived in maintenance. He looked over the droid checkout list, and only one astromech had been checked out within the last hour. It was to Bulldog. Mighty hit the recall button on his remote, and a few minutes later, the little astromech droid rolled up. Mighty then did a diagnostic of the droid's most recent run programs and sure enough, Bulldog had reprogrammed its hologram emitter. That was all the evidence Mighty needed, he promptly called the acting security officer.

An hour later Bulldog was arrested on charges of misappropriation of Alliance resources and breaking and entering. Bulldog was confined to the brig for 3 weeks. The only way that Bulldog will be set free is for Mighty to drop the charges or for Bulldog's CO to bail him out.


After his ordeal in the refresher, Hellcat only wanted one thing...revenge. When he exited his quarters, Hellcat bumped into Mighty who had just finished his maintenance duty and returned a rather mean look, "Whoa dude calm down. Not like I knew you were going to be there when I came out of my quarters." It was flight duty time for both him and Mighty, and both of them knew it wasn't going to be an interesting flight due to what had been pulled on the two of them by Bulldog.

When the two Rogue X-wings entered the blackness of space, Hellcat keyed in a private channel to Rogue Ten. "Mighty, Bulldog get you too?" asking out of curiosity.

"Nothing I wish to talk about, but yes," Mighty stated in a stern voice.

"Yeah he got me as well. Been brewing an idea in my head as to get him back. You do know that he and Locker have patrol duty after Krayt and Kid finish after us right?"

"Yes, Jalb bailed him out of the brig. What's on your mind evil one?"

"Well, here's what I was figuring..."

A few hours later the X-wings touched down on the hangar deck, and both Rogues climbed out of their craft. "Mighty, get in position while I grab my gear," Hellcat said as he opened the storage compartment of his X-wing. After getting his slicing gear out, he joined Mighty at Bulldog's A-wing, who had already opened up the propulsion system and nav computer terminals. Plugging in his terminal, Hellcat went to work to "reconfigure" the engine and navigational computers inside Bulldog's A-wing.

With time cutting short, the two Rogues finished the job they had intended to do with only seconds to spare as Bulldog and Locker came strolling into the hangar bay ready for their flight duty. "We're all set here HC, lets get to the ready room before Bulldog sees us," Mighty whispered as he snuck his way out of the hangar with Hellcat following closely behind. When the two finally arrived at the ready room, they saw at least six other pilots waiting for their patrol duties to start, but none with a high rank to punish both the Rogue's.

Sitting down at a table the two pilots stared intently at Hellcat's computer terminal when Alli approached them. "What are you two doing here? I thought ya'lls patrol was finished?"

"Well... umm... Hellcat was just showing me how to do a few minor slicing codes to access Imperial databanks next time we're on ground ops," Mighty lied.

"Yeah, ya can never guarantee one of the slicing experts is going to be at your side at all times ya know?" E

xamining the looks on their faces gave it away perfectly. They're lying, Alli thought to herself, but decided to leave it at that and go about her business.

When the two Rogues saw Alli walk away, they both shared a sigh of relief and then turned back to the computer terminal. "What's their status HC?"

"Bulldog's lead craft, and they're both out about 4 klicks. Shall we?" Hellcat said as he positioned his finger over a button with an evil grin on his face.

"Need you ask that Hellcat? I'm always ready, Furball!" Rogue Ten slapped his buddy on the back of the head.

"Corsair 6 to Corsair 12, how's everything going over there?" Bulldog asked as he brought the nose of his fighter 45 degrees to the left.

"Can't complain here Bulldog." As the two A-wings moved towards their next position, Bulldog recalled the pranks he has pulled on Hellcat and Bulldog just hours ago. The moment was to be short lived, however, as his craft came to an immediate stop. "Hey what gives?!" Bulldog exclaimed to no one in particular.

"Six, is everything alright over there? Why did you stop?" Locker asked as he brought his fighter around to investigate.

A little irritated, Bulldog started running diagnostics on his flight system when all of the sudden the computer informed the Corsair that hyperspace jump would commence in "5..4..3..2..1," "What the hellllll!" Bulldog shouted as the craft lunged into hyperspace, only to come back out a few seconds later.

Checking his coordinates, he realized that he had jumped 30 klicks out from the Liberty. Again the A-wing started acting up as it turned and stopped. "Now what?" the young pilot asked to himself. And once again the A-wing did an in-system jump to the other side of the Liberty.

When it exited hyperspace, Bulldog tried to collect his thoughts as to what is going on with his A-wing, but didn't get a chance to relax when the nimble fighter slammed him back into the seat, doing yet another in-system jump. Five minutes went by, and by now the A-wing had done a total of 5 in-system jumps, dropping its fuel capacity enough that he wouldn't be able to do another in-system jump. Relieved, he checked his coordinates from the Liberty and saw he was a mere 50 klicks out. "This is going to be a long ride back home," thought Bulldog. Punching his throttle to full, he sat back in his seat to wait for the fighter to arrive at the Mon Cal cruiser, but something else happened. All of the sudden, a buzzer in his fighter's cockpit started going off signaling his number two engine was out. The A-wing started into a flat spin in the direction for the Liberty as a result.

"Well that takes care of the pest problem," Hellcat said sitting back in his chair and putting his hands behind his back while shutting off his terminal. "Whoa, hey Kitty, won't he be able to shut down and restart his engines if you turn your equipment off?" "Nah Mighty, I sent one last string of codes to not only block manual override of the propulsion system, but to also re-initialize the number 2 engine when he gets within 1.3 klicks of the Liberty. Don't worry he'll be fine...well almost fine. I'll feel sorry for the tech crews that have to clean out the cockpit of his fighter. I hope he didn't eat anything "chunky" this afternoon!" Getting up, Hellcat grabbed his gear and said a good evening to his pal as he walked back to his quarters while whistling the tune of "Whistle While We Work."


"Ahh, Sir?" Darklighter, Rogue Twelve said as he turned to face the person who had just called him.

"How are you Joel?" the Corsair CO said as he caught up to the young Rogue. "Long time no see, what have you been up to?" Jalb_k asked, the picture of innocence.

Darklighter took a double take at the senior officer, not quite sure he had seen the malicious little twinkle in his eyes or not. "Uh, not a great deal Sir. Just routine mainly, you know how it is. Been hoping to avoid getting pranked, and I help saved Bulldog."

"Yes, as a matter of fact I do, I know exactly how it is Joel." There was no mistaking the glint in the eyes now, the glint of a predator prepared to strike. He pulled a pad out of his thigh pocket and showed it to Joel. "This mean anything to ya mate?"

Joel looked down and saw a few brief lines on the pad and below them, a still image. It was the image that caught his attention. He looked back up and straight into Jalb's eyes, the first twinges of uncertainty giving way to great waves of panic.

Jalb smiled as he noticed a bead of sweat form on the Rogue's forehead. "Mmmm, takes one to catch one, eh. No problemo, just letting you know that I know." Jalb smiled again and pocketed the pad. "See you around Joel" he said and patted the young pilot on the shoulder. "Oh, and by the way... Watch your back mate." With that Chris turned on his heel and strolled away, whistling softly to himself.

Darklighter stood rooted to the spot watching as Corsair Leader sauntered off and as Jalb turned the corner Joel was sure he heard a faint "Yes, got him".

Hellcat got the attention of the pilots in his quarters. "Ok, now we know who it is. Condor and I have a great idea to get him. So, let's get started shall we."

To be Continued...